Gratitude

I'll keep this short and simple, because I don't intend for this to be some sort of lengthy poetic narrative, but merely as a reminder of what I should remember every day of my life. And as a timestamp of the many many wonderful things I have to be grateful for in this 21st year of my life.

I am grateful for the never-ending guidance and support of my sisters: the love and humour and mental sympathy of the sisters I am currently active with; the worldly guidance, affection, and candid advice of the alums that see so much potential in me; and the colorful personalities, characters, and backgrounds of which they possess and come from that only serve to brighten my life.

I am grateful for a healthy and loving family: for a father, while stoic and difficult, shows his affection, dedication, wit, and love through his own stubborn ways; for a mother whose overbearing love permeates my heart and guides me towards being a better woman and daughter; for a brother that has served to be the greatest role model of all, showing that a huge heart and perseverance can overcome any obstacles life throws at you; and for a sister that has never needed words or additional explanation to look into the very core of me and know who I am, the pain I feel, and the instant love and sense of sympathy I find from just one look.

I am grateful for the boy who has loved me through all my faults, my stubbornness; who's seen right through my facades and attempts to be stoic and resistant. You've shown me that love cannot be dismissed or saved for later; its something we must treasure and appreciate right now, while it lasts. An amazing person and a truly good man (a rarity above all), I'm grateful to have you in my life.

I am grateful for the friends that have shown me such sincerity and care throughout these past couple weeks; who, despite having exchanged few words in real life, have never hesitated to offer me a kind word or encouraging post. Yes, I am talking about you!

And finally, I am grateful for the opportunity at a bright future - for a chance at success that is both at once frightening and liberating. The world is mine for the taking, and I plan on taking it by storm. I cannot let all the people above me down; this is my exchange for my gratitude.

Precious.

I've mentioned before that I often think of death, and how satisfied I would be with what I've accomplished if my life were to be suddenly cut short. I've always lived by this thought, by the determination that, should that ever happen to me, that I would never look back and see missed opportunities and half-hearted attempts. That I would look back, and see the legacy and the memories I've created, and harbor no regrets. Little did I know that I was thinking of Ying all along.

Ying was incredibly special to me. We were not close; when we spoke the rare times, she was nice but impersonal. But she represented so much to me - she was incredibly successful, a fearless and dedicated leader; she was smart, capable, and confident. She was part of the Cap and Skull Society, spearheaded the very first class of the AACC Internship, and, most importantly to me, re-dug RCC out of its ashes. She was everything I had hoped to become. Her name was carved into everything I accomplished, three steps ahead.

When I'd heard about her passing today, my thoughts immediately went to my thoughts about life, death, and success. Life is so incredibly precious, and could be taken away at any moment's notice. It does not wait for you to accomplish your goals, to mend friendships, to recover from heartbreak. You can't tell it to hold off until your birthday, can't promise it peaceful return in exchange for one last chance. To be able to look back, and believe that I have truly done everything I can and taken every opportunity I could, that is all I could wish for.

Rest in Peace, Ying. You will forever be VIVA RCC.